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I’m not sure that anything I might hear about Betty could surprise me now! My main feelings about this incredible privilege of being so close to the women who knew her, experienced her, learned directly from her are gratitude, awe, and pride in what women can accomplish.
Every time I imagine her creating Liberating Masturbation in the analog world I realize how ‘spoiled I have become now that so much is digitized.
What is my excuse for not doing something similar? Listening to the book CUNT these days. Feeling challenged to express myself as a sexual being and watching myself hold myself back! What can I do that would surprise and delight ME? Perhaps inspire others in new ways? And what kind of support can I ask for and subsequently allow myself to receive?Chico State: Betty was so much ahead of her time! I so regret that I never heard her speak. I have to look up weather there was even a chance… When I grow up (or maybe just retire) I want to be able to give such an honest and entertaining recounting of my sexual history (what I can remember anyway!)
Yale: Still in the vanguard! Still so very funny! Putting it all out there after all those years…
The absolute best thing about Betty’s process is that she developed the rituals organically from suggestions that the women who were participating themselves made. There were times when she and Sheila would try something and it was pretty far out and then the women would balk and then Betty and Sheila would just keep going and try something else! No judgment no harm no foul. Get together again and see what happens in the new context, different people, etc.
In my experience during those years two different yet related things were going on. One was first that we who were outspokenly feminist did not want to scare women away by getting two personal. We didn’t talk so openly in those days, at least I didn’t. Even in the feminist circles that I was running in I don’t remember any explicit discussions of sexual behavior.
Secondly, many lesbian women that I knew were deep in the closet for good reason, especially those who had achieved some level of status and respect, particularly in academia where I was. First of all many of them weren’t even out to their closest colleagues and family. And career wise it could be devastating to admit to such a difference.
My theory about the standing ovation at the NOW conference is that it was a relatively anonymous thing, once one was present in such a huge gathering, to stand up and cheer to see a taboo smashed to smithereens. It wasn’t really that risky in that context.
I loved the video of Betty talking about her art over the years. A lot of those images I had not seen before! Current favorites are all the vulvas, so lovingly detailed… what skill and patience. Who knew there was so much variety? Hopefully someone has carried on documenting cunts in line drawings.
Page 74.
…we were going to be in the nude. I could tell it was a threatening idea. I only wanted to play with courageous women.I have more or less talked the bodysex talk since my early teens. These groups, if I end up participating, with be an experience of actually walking the walk.
So much coming up for me… past, present.. FUTURE??? Did I feel resistance?! Are you kidding me?!
I am 68years old. I have known of, admired, recommended Betty for years and consider myself a radical feminist. Until now I have lived my life personally and professionally but not so much sexually ‘walking the walk’.of life consistent with the bodysex philosophy & principles though I wouldn’t have known to call them that.
Since joining this course I have blown my own mind with each dip or dive into the material. Trying to take it slow, not getting ahead of my self. I’ve done things before that I was afraid to do and that is how I got here and now. (Brava! to me) I’m not so much resistant as aware of being at yet another boundary/threshold of community/relationships/self awareness. Lore Perls said “anxiety is excitement without support”. OK, I buy that, I sell it daily. So how am I going to support myself? I do really feel like (maybe) my whole life has been preparing me to be part of the bodysex community/movement in a significant way. Therapy. Practice masturbating. Read and watch and listen. Eventually be in person? (I did sign up for the event in May.) Writing to you today is a beginning! Please stay tuned.
As far as a standout moment… hard to pick a single one. I will watch it again (and again). Can’t wait to watch it with the event on 1/22. I will write agin after that!
Bodysex is a way for me to here to begin with my sexual self again and to reconnect with the power of the erotic. Its an opportunity to get back on a path that I more or less strayed from (into drinking & centering on male partners) when I was in my 20s. I recently remembered that about 60 years ago (age @ 17) I introduced masturbation to my high school BFF lying in separate sleeping bags in the dark of a tent in her backyard!
